i hate life

how i wish my memory is take and i remember nothing..yeah, that's because i don't think i have those happy moment, let me be forgetful and lets me develop hatred and love (if there is) all over again, cause the pain that are already there were too much i couldn't bear any more pain..

puppy love

in my last entry, i mention about puppy love...how it can effect your whole life???it depends on how u carry it, sometimes the wind that goes by, might be really helpful, but sometimes when that wind turns into endless storm, well u will know what i mean...wanna know mine?????

i met my very true first love in my first year as junior high school, as in my first year, it was very confusing+ with all the controversy i created, to attract attention from boys, yeah boys...when i met him, i never thought that i will be with him...by the end of the year, I end it up by saying Watashi wa anataga aishiteru...yes it was sweet..
day by days, months by months, i end up to be with him for almost two and a quarter years...well, it didn't end up well as you thought..but i find it way back home, and yet i met another men..as year passing by, i realized that not love that i seek out for in high school, it gotta be education..so get back up...and my high school moment end up very sweet with the straight 6 A's for my spm...i counted how many guys i met after the first heart broken???? the number means nothing but for certain people, '6' can described how i treated man through out those years...

i am more than happy enough to say that campus life is better without man by my side...

campus life

tak tau lan nape malam ni aku rasa frust sangat...online banyak2 sebab nak ilangkan tension...teringat kat dia..bagi yang bukan rumet aku mungkin tak tau sape si dia tu..entahlah, sometimes rasa cam tension plak bila pikir pasal die..one of my rumet pernah tanye, "still hoping lagi ke kat dia"..well u don't understand people. this is not an ordinary crush u people thought of, this is purely a true love that even i don't really get it..susah lah...and actually that is one of the biggest reason kenapa aku buat keputusan yang sangat besar next sem....mesti semua orang terkejut..tapi if aku ditakdirkan terpaksa hadap muka dia hari-hari, rasanya, aku mesti tak leh nak focus kat study, well talking about study, ada lagi one year before aku graduate, and if you have to ask me, campus life is the one that you never wanted to erase from your memory. because that is the time when people start getting mature (tak tau lah certain people yang still immatured tu kan), and that is the time when you start to learn the real love is, bukan puppy love yang kita selalu banggakan tu...bila dah kat campus ni, barulah sedar, apa yang cikgu2 dulu kat sekolah cakap pasal puppy love tu, yang dia tak kekal, bleh buat kita hilang focus dalam study, it was actually 100% true..so people out there, especially high schooler, jangan lah bercinta macam nak rak sampai nak abai pelajaran semua, tapi bila difikirkan balik, lebih baik bercinta masa sekolah, dah rasa masam manis nye, daripada ditinggalkna dan rasa perasaan dikecewakan when you're at the highest point in your life, campus life...

makan belacan byk sikit lain kali

yes i am cynical but i am not stupid sampai tak tau ape itu "belacan" dan "tempoyak", tu namanye bukan moden dan stylish, tapi kalau sampai tak tau pasal culture kaum sendiri, memang layak lah ko tu dipanggil "katak bawah tempurung", ops! oleh kerana ko duduk kat bandar, katak bawah kotak kasut pun blehlah, ntah pape je. klu ye pun kononnye ko tu bodo and knonnye innocent,(innocent lah sgt), tak payah lah buat muka sinis bandar tu ann suruh org ulang balik explaination tu...menyampah aku heeh

let the flame begin

yes i am having a new attitude, one that i think this is the real me, i notice my new small mole today, which i found some cuteness on it, however, some people said, having a new mole mean u are having a brand new attitude??ermmm..wonder what it is. I was thinking of Mark, the man i knew from the internet, which offended of my way of defending my religion...i don't know..just go to hell with him
i got some serious issues of handling my eyes recently. I got a scary to hell eyes and i just can't control my scary to some people i hate.oh man...

i don't know why

im feeling kind of overwhelming right now, i'd been so unlucky in the past few days and now i guess im missing someone..

Bandage girl

 

lihat lah kaki ku yang berbandage ni..sgt gemuk kan..yelah bengkak cam nak meletup tak besar pulak kan...haha

Jatuh terpeleot

tadi masa pegi klebang utk tgk najib,adalah kumpulan Hujan tu dier perform pulak..mak pun head banging lah sepuas hati mak...tetiba mak jatuh terpele0t hah..amb0i sakitnye bukan  main lagi...BERBISA tau dak???dah macam nak patah dah...tulah mel0mpat lagi macam 0rg giler...ni sume disebabkan HUJAN la ni..dah kaki aku ni tak b0leh jalan, sape yang penah alami tau lah k0t rasanye kan...kata rumet mak, sebelum mak penah jatuh tak, klu penah and klu mak tak pernah pegi urut memang teruk ar...mmg mak tak penah pegi urut pun sepanjang umur mak, A cakap dulu dier penah kena and memang merana giler, smpai 2 minggu baru baik,,,aduh mcam mana nak g kelas pasni, susah lah....

love at the first sight

did you guys actually believe to love at the first sight??I am a strong non-believer of the "love at the first sight" before, but then i met this guy, he's cute of course, have i found anyone not cute????no..but usually i just blew it off and thought of it as creepy and nonsense. And this Guy actually blew me off, let just call him Mr.Nice Guy, before he definitely the nicer guy i ever met. I always thought i would never get it off with my crush of my classmate M, but this guy totally made me unwind. i never think of a person ( i mean cute, handsome, bla,bla, bla) more than 2 days, but this is definitely something i can't get over with. I wish i could meet him today but when i realize i was just wearing bad outfit, then i wish to not accidentally meet him today. With no make-up and all. Usually i don't even give a shit bout it, but this time, i was really something. I never felt this way before, my heart is pounding like crazy and i just can't stop thinking about him... 

Anal0g tape rec0rder

susah betul lah nak cari pasal anal0g tape rec0rder ni, camne nak buat??/anal0g tape rec0rder 2 pun aku tak tau, apatah lagi nak buat, aku ni kejenyer mengunmpat je and tak pernah rec0rd benda2 macam tu...eh kena cari cepat2 nie, nnti ada jugak yang mengamuk aku pakai br0adband dier ha..

what the fuck with s0me pe0ple??

lain kali klu ada yang tak suka/ geram, tak payah lah nak cerita kat 0rg lain yang takde kene mengena, ni tak, depan2 di0rg jugak k0 nak cakap pasal bayaran lah, pasal kit0rg pakai benda tu tak cakap lah, ha, sekarang aku p0st kat bl0g pasal perangai k0 tuh, sentap kit0rg tau tak, E mmg lah tak cakap pape, even Z pun sama, s0 d0n't expect us t0 d0 everything u want and everything u said, kitrg pun ada perasaan jugak, s0 jgn nak suka2 perb0d0hkan kit0rg depan 0rg lain, klu ada benda yang tak puas hati, cakap depan2, ermm...mmg lah k0 cakap dpn2, tapi dpn 0rg lain, settle kiter2 sudah...

Tak jadi lah

tetiba tak jadi plak yang umah tuu tuh, bak kata Eda and Chaca, benda tu sape nak je...memang tak lah sape yang nak, penat tuh, sebanrnye sedih n0k nak pegi (ceh memb0h0ng je aku)..heheheeheheh

Miss Fatimah Yasmin

hui Miss Fatimah Yasmin sgt best and comel, tetiba nak jadikan dia idol pulak, heh, tapi nape pulak pegi Rumah org tua tu jadi compulsory pulak, alah miss, tak pegi tak bleh ke???abis la rosak plan aku this week nak mandi kat Asahan, takpelah miss dah terpaksa nak wat camne, Ikki ni p0n satu bila nak bagi slide Advert pun aku tak tau, penat dah mak tunggu neh, nak buat assignment tak tau f0rmat dier camne nak buat???ad0000iiiiiii....ha uruf o aku bila nak betul???penat mak gune nb 0 je nih, asignment dah nak mula, tapi laptop tak betul2 lagi...next week nak pegi interview pun tak set date and buat surat HEP lagi nie,,,cik Zati ni bila pulak nak confirm kan...

Fewh!!

sekarang ni dah kec0h pasal budak part yang nama syahz tu buat taik..nampaknye mmg ade je lah t0pic baru nak discuss kat sunshine tu (discuss ker)..haha..now giler boring, tadi pagi aku pegi ATM ada nampak sorg budak tu cute giler, aku rasa dier budak part 3 lah kot kan, yelah tgk gaya cam budak kecik je (ceh padahal sebaya aku je, muda satu sem je kot), aku ni tgh bengang ngan laptop bodo aku ni, klu lah korg perasan aku gune "o" gune number 0, huruf o tu takleh tekan, kena gune screen keyboard..jadi cacat cam tgn aku yg dah cacat tuh..nak gi kelas Advert nieh, panas lah ari ni, cam malas plak..

XOXO
Deela Cullen Hashim

Baru nak rasa..

ha! baru la nak rasa perkembangan dunia sekarang, semua 0rg dah ada bl0g sdr mak bru lah terkial2 nak buat...saje je..mak tak de masa la nyah...